Me and My Money

Credit card desperation sinks single Mom...

Posted November 25, 2011
Originally Published March 4, 2010

Q: Through years of barely making ends meet as a single mother I used credit cards to break even every month. Now I am 46 and recently became a teacher. It was the best decision I've ever made but it feels too late as far as finances go. I went bankrupt in 1996 and I'm on the verge of that again, overdrawn with overwhelming credit card bills.

I live in a very modest apt, complete with mice, faulty wiring and crappy water pressure. I hate living here but the rent is only $650 a month.

I am so depressed as it feels pretty hopeless. Could my wages be garnisheed? The thought of living in a cardboard box when I'm elderly is frightening as hell. How can I help myself move in a better direction?

A: All is not lost and all is not hopeless. You’ve made a major career move so congratulate yourself for that. The first bankruptcy may have cauterized the wound but it didn’t get rid of the problem. A new job and new determination can do that but you need help to negotiate the debt detritus of your old life.

Your wages won’t be garnisheed until after the debts have gone to collection, you have been notified that legal action might be taken and given a set amount of time to pay before the case goes to court.

Call Credit Canada (416) 228-3328 {syndication pls insert Contact http://www.creditcounsellingcanada.ca/nova_scotia.html} where a counselor can help you with a debt management plan and negotiate with your creditors. The next step is a workable budget, a savings plan and a goal of improving your living conditions.

Don’t give up. You can do it.


Q: My boyfriend just moved back home to help fix his mother’s house and save money to get married and buy a house.

Recently, his mother, 60, lost her job. She has no savings, no skills and still owes on the house which isn’t in good condition.

We fear she will have to live with us and given the stress of in-laws, that may lead to us breaking up. I am also fearful about marriage because his mother’s monthly expenses are $1,600, too much for us to carry. With pressure for him to support her how could we ever have a life together?

He is heartbroken. So am I. A.P.



A: I’m a big fan of not doing what frightens you. So don’t. There are other options to a menage a trois. Her financial woes are not your responsibility but you can and should help.

Your future mother-in-law has an asset, her house. A real estate agent can provide an opinion about renos and the priorities for a limited budget if she decides to sell. Is refinancing for a lower interest rate an option? She may be able to cut down the monthly payment by stretching the amortization. She could also take in a boarder.

You say she has no skills but she has held a job so is capable of doing something. She isn’t old and could work for a number of years. Urge her to contact a Service Canada for a centre near you (www.servicecanada.gc.ca/eng/home) to create a resume and search for a job. There are also provincial job help links on the site. She should apply for Employment Insurance if eligible or start taking CPP early.

The next step is the toughest. If your boyfriend’s mother is expecting you to bail her out financially you absolutely must address this head on and resist it as long as she has other options.

This is going to be hard on your boyfriend if he has to choose between Mom and your life together. It sounds like he has been the go-to son for her, which is admirable, but I see no reason why she can’t be responsible for her own financial wellbeing.

post a comment about this blog

*Display Name:

*Comment:

*type captcha text:

We reserve the right to remove any comment we see unfit for use on this website.